meditation

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This weekend, I found myself alone in a central subway station. I had a lot of time to kill – a couple of hours before I would be leaving the trains. I played around with my phone for a little bit, watched people walk by, and purchased a bottle of water. Then I sat on a bench, pulled my legs into a cross-legged seated position, and began to meditate. It was a challenge at first, what with people coming and going, sitting near me or standing and waiting, screeching trains every few minutes, the nonstop bustle of a major city. Still, I was able to slowly follow my breath into the center of my body, and push away the sights and sounds around me, finding happiness. The time passed, and I was content.

It was later that I realized that this story makes a good metaphor for life. The people and trains that parade through the subway like clockwork mirror the emotions and events in our own lives. If we allow them, they will happily distract us for our entire lives. Only when we are forced to do we stop and look inside… otherwise we are just another blank face in the crowd, waiting for our train to come.

Sometimes it’s hard for me to take time out. I work a lot, and necessarily spend a lot of time moving from one place to another. Finding time to reflect on oneself is always difficult, but among the most rewarding things. When I was young, I would frequent the dark corners of my mind, and see what was hiding there. As I got older, this natural tendency towards thought led me to classic novels, meditation, and a propensity for long, solitary walks in the woods. Unfortunately, the more I see of the world, the harder it is to find time to reflect upon it. I continuously strive to escape the daily grind, which in modern society is a loose requirement for a satisfying life. I always want a unique, individual business to succeed so I can make optimal use of my time and increase my own awareness and happiness, but the workings of getting there leave little time along the way. The casualties of starting something new are many, and sometimes I playfully wonder if I should not just accept the everyday life most Americans enjoy, and jealously guard the petty hours left to me by world.

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